10 Comments
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Michael Pershan's avatar

We make a big deal about lying as little as possible to our kids, particularly about the tough stuff. This often gets us in weird situations where we tell our kids things about death, sex, birth, WW2, the Big Bang, that they honestly and genuinely don't care about. But because they don't actually care, it just becomes more stuff for them to indiscriminately shout about. "You're going to die first!" "She has a vulva!" "I KNOW WHAT GOD LOOKS LIKE." Whatever man, it's all good, if slightly embarrassing. But we could probably do with a bit more lying in our family life.

That said, I certainly DO remember times when adults lied to me when I was young and I have NOT forgiven them for laughing at me when I believed them.

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Michael Gerber's avatar

I'm trying to reconstruct the single conversation where your children said "You're going to die first!" "She has a vulva!" and "I KNOW WHAT GOD LOOKS LIKE."

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Brad's avatar

Your columns are so good! Don’t take this as an insult, but you should have a column in the New York Times.

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Michael Gerber's avatar

Brad, you're very kind to say that, but I failed the NYT's application essay question: "Trans People: Threat or Menace?"

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Brad's avatar

Somehow, I’m sure it’s Biden’s fault (according to Maureen Dowd).

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Jerry Fisher's avatar

Enjoyed this reminiscence but was totally expecting the directions/recipe for Dad’s Omelette at end. Everybody wishes they could make a great omelette, not just a flop-over with cheese in the middle. But I won’t hold you to it and I’m happy to be a new subscriber to your sub stack.

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Michael Gerber's avatar

Jerry, lemme see if the Big Guy will divulge his secrets.

"1. Be a French chef

2. ..."

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Gavin's avatar

I have been told that eating an omelette cooked without butter is like kissing someone without a moustache.

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David S.'s avatar

For some reason, I always assumed you were Jewish. Maybe it's the name and the punim. Oh well, I guess some gentiles are funny!

David

Reader #773,287

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James Finn Garner's avatar

Best way to make an omelet? Fill the middle with chili.

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