21 Comments
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Laura Fox's avatar

“Oh most high one! Most holy one! Most powerful one!”

This is how he makes me address him at work.

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Michael Gerber's avatar

I feel it lends a certain texture to the day

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E.R. Flynn's avatar

The Arthur Hailey grandeur of it all! What a difference from flying in the 1980s, where my first flight was on People's Express, who assigned me to sit in the poultry section and collect eggs for the pilot's breakfast.

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Michael Pershan's avatar

After reading the wikipedia article about aircraft hijackings, I'm pretty sure I could've pulled off a plane heist in the 1970s.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_aircraft_hijackings#1970s

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Michael Gerber's avatar

Yes but where would you make them take you?

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Michael Pershan's avatar

[Gun to the pilot's head] "I don't know! Wherever you were already going is fine!"

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Brad's avatar

You’re the Bruce McCall of humorous prose!

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Michael Gerber's avatar

High praise indeed! We always wanted bruce for the magazine, but his illness prevented him from producing much work (or so brian told me).

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James Finn Garner's avatar

Life was just so much more LIVABLE back then!!

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James Finn Garner's avatar

And the luggage sherpas. You forgot to mention the luggage sherpas.

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Michael Gerber's avatar

Hello I’m Tenzing Norgay, and Elton John and I want to tell you about something special happening on Midwest Airlines…

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James Finn Garner's avatar

Life was just so much more livable back then.

Now I need a guide to get me to the bathroom in one piece and without blue goop on me.

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David Perlmutter's avatar

A very different time....

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Two Gazebos's avatar

Perfect!

Have you ever read the Frank Sullivan humor piece “The Night the Old Nostalgia Burned Down”?

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Michael Gerber's avatar

It rings a bell, but I’ve read very little Sullivan. Just what’s in the Subtreasury, etc.

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Donald Koller's avatar

Oh for sure, I've talked to people who make flying in the 70's sound like it was a public mile-high club. Which it probably was if you were Dean Martin. I first flew in 1987 at age 16, so I never had the experience as a wee lad, but I remember, and it was more like today with the exception of being served a (hot) not-so-great meal (Detroit to Orlando). So where is the line of demarcation between then and now? Between watching Tony Bennett and Joe Frazier ham it up in the lounge and the quiet contemplation of perhaps needing to restrain a fellow passenger in a chokehold to keep them from jumping out?

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Michael Gerber's avatar

Airline deregulation in 1978. That's when it changed.

And once air travel became a form of bus travel, we were sunk. (Yes, I still wear a tie when I fly.)

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Michael Gerber's avatar

So YOU were the one who installed the Ring camera in there

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Mark Banash's avatar

For some reason, this reminds me of an old Michael O'Donoghue line about the 1920s being so posh they had butter in taxicabs.

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Mark Santangelo's avatar

I remember taking a class on German history back in college. On the first day of class, the professor would start with something that actually happened, like the Franco-Prussian War, and then at some point make something up, then lecture on and on as if that thing had really happened, and the consequences thereof. It got pretty wacky near the end, and people would finally figure out he was making things up and stop taking notes. ("Every year, that moment when people stop taking notes gets deeper and deeper into the class," he told us, once the jig was officially up - in the 80s, we took authority plenty seriously - and he had to keep extending the lecture notes, which sounded like a chore but he bore it up well.)

I had a similar feeling as I read this, Mike.

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the real pambo's avatar

I always wondered about those piano lounges up the spiral staircases! As a kid in the 70’s, our family flew from Florida to California (we won an all expenses paid trip to Disneyland) and the one thing I remembered was the SMOKING section on the plane. Even at that young age, I thought it was the most ridiculous thing. There wasn’t an effective filtration system to suck out the smoke before it wafted back to the “non-smoking” section where we sat. Your descriptions whisked me back to that era and filled in the blanks on a lot of things I’d wondered about!

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