Jokes! Jokes! Jokes!

Now with extra self-promotion…and ART

Jun 06, 2023

It’s the 251 digest, and constant reader Louisa is back with another question:

At the end of the day you guys just write jokes all day, right? Not exactly Shakespeare. What is the artistic value of what you do?

Louisa, the day that we can’t answer that question, that’s the day we jokesters close up shop and become, ugh, dramatists.

A joke, fundamentally, is about curiosity. Curiosity is what intrigues the reader in the setup. It’s the arm that curls out towards your subconscious, towards the taboo—even the Divine. That’s right, the Divine. The punchline then rewards (or punishes) the reader’s curiosity.

So, Louisa, these are not just jokes. We unblushingly declare that we practice the highest art. We are painters of curiosity, limners of scenes that nourish and reassure the battered mind. Come out, a joke says. It’s safe to play.

Now, it adds, with a bit of menace.

And the perfect instance of all this Divinity-fondling is a recently published cartoon by Curious Jack Reilly:

At 251 we also recently published a piece from Robert Criss titled “I’m out of order? You’re out of order!” which has become a favorite of ours. You may be thinking, Michael, there is no possible way that you can connect this fact to your previous vibing about curiosity. But note the following:

You want to know how I will make a connection.
Ergo, you are curious.
Checkmate buddy.

Here it is, Criss’ piece:

I’m out of order? You’re out of order! This whole court is out of order! The files in your filing cabinet are out of order! The vending machines in the hallway are out of order! The words this in sentence are order out of!
I’m exaggerating this traffic court proceeding? You’re exaggerating this traffic court proceeding! This whole traffic court is exaggerating this traffic court proceeding! Your Honor’s tall chair and making me say “Your Honor” is exaggerating this traffic court proceeding! The mural depicting natives and pilgrims as pals is exaggerating this traffic court proceeding! The armed bailiffs surrounding me are exaggerating this traffic court proceeding!
I’m speaking without permission and will be held in contempt of court? You’re speaking without permission and will be held in contempt of me! This whole court is operating without anyone’s permission and will be held in contempt of court-court! That gavel is banging without registration and will be held in contempt of loud-wooden-mallet court and could be tried as a weapon! The courtroom furniture is furnishing without feng shui and will be held in contempt of interior-design court, no chance of parole! The stenographer recording us will be held in contempt of fast-typers court which has a very tough judge and this is a death penalty state—write that down!
I’m out of order means I’m in the wrong place in line? I apologize, your Honor, I misunderstood. I hope this court can forgive me. I’m forgiven? You’re forgiven! This whole court is forgiven!

And, in other 251 news:

And now, a bit of sponsored content.

This section is sponsored by Michael Pershan, who asked for a little bit of space for himself in the newsletter. Publisher Gerber told him to pay $150 and then he could publish precisely one photograph and one sentence. After they agreed, Publisher Gerber raised it to $200.

Here is that photograph and sentence.

I have recently been touched with sadness so deep—even surfing can’t cure it.

Thank you to Publisher Gerber. That sentence and photograph are why Michael Pershan’s children will not be getting birthday presents this year.

READERS, PROMOTE THYSELFS

¹ And in the third year of the reign of King Biden, a man was visited by the Spirit, and the Spirit spoke unto him.

² And this is what it said: Tell the people, I tire of their self-promotion, I am exhausted by their endless sharing. Their hustle-tinged bleating wears on me, and I bid it STOP.

³ And then the Spirit continued: Had you there for a minute!

⁴ The Spirit went on: No, clarify unto the people that I actually would very much like them to self-promote. That this is sort of a mutually beneficial thing, as it is good to hear what is up. Good for them, and good for Us

⁵ And the Spirit wouldn’t stop: Actually, no, put it like this to the people: Would the Lord have given you the ability to self-promote if I didn’t intend you to use it? And therefore you must self-promote.

⁶ But then again, the Spirit elaborated, you might think that I gave you the capacity to self-promote as some sort of test. But verily I tell you: it’s not a test. Of course, that’s what I would sayeth, were I testing you.

⁷ But I am not. Promiseth.

⁸ So, self-promote. Please. Thank you. Spirit, out.